Birth matters

Amanda Rayment introduces her new online training to us and answers the question 'Does birth matter?'

What a great title Eva has offered me as a guest blog. Some people would say 'yes Birth Matters!' Others may say 'no not for me'. As always we could gather evidence for both sides of the coin. As one of the tutors of an Antenatal Teachers Training programme, “Bringing Antenatal Teaching Home”, it would appear Birth does matter in my life. I am happy to have this opportunity to share how birth can be an opportunity to dive deeper into love.

The parent and child relationship offers us the potential to discover true freedom. Imagine for a moment being accepted and welcomed simply for the beauty of who you are. Imagine for a moment offering this gift of love to your child. This is the opportunity or the blessing that is available in every parent and child relationship.

The birth of a child could be called an involuntary action, by this I mean that birth is going to take place. We may not know how or when, or we may know how and when, either way it will occur. I often say life provides. The mother need do nothing, birth will occur. Many times there is a tendency to busy ourselves attending to the details or solving problems. In this busyness and doing it is easy to miss the blessing that is being offered. Our full attention often becomes distracted with the many details.

When parents make contact with this so called involuntary action it is often a very direct experience. I have heard parents say it is a ”very profound experience,” "it opened our hearts”, “it was full on”. It can be as if the mother has to draw upon a wisdom deep within her. Then rest in this existence while a huge physiological process occurs. This can be as profound for the father witnessing the process as the mother directly encountering the process. Sometimes through this experience a yearning arises to discover more of what demands our full attention, more contact with what I am calling 'life provides', more of our true nature.

I have discovered that birth doesn’t need defending or used as a grandiose symbol in our life. Of course we are all free to play in this way and this is neither right nor wrong. To leave birth alone is to loosen the chains, if you like of this enormous symbol in the story of the parent and child relationship. So why do I choose to train women as antenatal teachers?

*Birth can be a sign post to dive deeper in to love.

* Birth can be the catalyst in discovering that all the answers to your questions of responsibility as a parent are resting in your heart and the heart of your child. They share the same source.

*Birth asks of us our full attention, not in the sense of attending to external details. Our full attention is required in trusting our self, in trusting our child .If external circumstances need to be attended to let your heart guide you.

*Birth offers us the opportunity to discover our true nature is not dependent on external circumstances. By this I mean that the way in which we birth either “natural” or “medical” is neither right nor wrong. It is just the form, yes of course we may have preferences. If I go back to my words earlier, imagine being welcomed and accepted simply for the beauty of who we are. Why not let birth just be and focus our full attention on extending and receiving love. Love can both be expressed through a so called “natural birth” and a so called “medical birth”.

So in answer to the title of the blog, Birth matters, yes it matters not in the form that it appears. Birth matters in the sense that it is such a beautiful sign post to dive ever deeper into love. The opportunity for both parent and child to discover together the love that they both are.  How wonderful is that? I would also like to offer the thought, that the birth of a baby offers the opportunity to awaken tenderness and love within ourselves. And that those who offer themselves as assistance in this experience have exactly the same opportunity. If these thoughts call to you in some way we offer a training programme where you will be supported to offer antenatal, birth and postpartum work from your heart to the heart of the parents and babies who knock on your workroom door.

Thank you Eva for reminding us all that Birth matters and as always to express my gratitude for all your great work in this arena, there is so much information and assistance offered through this company Born, let’s all use it!

~ Love Amanda